Fly Hunter
Wednesday, May 28th, 2008 by JonathanHis eyes were cold, vacant, menaced. He shuffled through the front office with great conviction, picking up an outdated copy of Q magazine on the way by. It was clear this part-time employee was in no mood to jabber, there were greater matters at hand.
It was Tuesday morning when I first noticed the nasty big fly putzing around the office, ungracefully bashing into walls and grazing my head once in a while. Nicki soon became the target of the fly’s aggression. By late-afternoon, and after several failed efforts at destroying or releasing the creature, I had developed a defensive twitch. Based on the fact that a typical fly lives just two weeks and the heft of this particular specimen, I simply gave up and let Mother Nature run her inevitable course. That was, until Ryan Goan (the aforementioned part-timer) manned up this afternoon.
Q Magazine in hand, he confidently walked into the kitchen and closed the door behind him. Never one to question the decencies of that highly complicated man, I simply went about my work and paid no attention to the frenzy in the kitchen. It wasn’t until I heard that terrible buzz, that I turned my head towards the kitchen. Ryan was in full offensive position, swinging all limbs like an attacking cougar!! Q Magazine in one hand, Pledge spray bottle in the other. In a flash, I saw him bat the fly to the floor, spraying a direct shot of solvent onto the insect, and follow through with a punishing crack of the magazine and another!
I managed to capture only several pictures before the assassination had been carried out and Ryan humbly returned to his desk. In a word, it was… amazing.
